Craft Marketeering

I’ve been meaning to write this for a while but have been distracted by travel both business and leisure. But today I am going to switch from astronomer to anthropologist.

For the past 2 years I have attended all but one* of the craft markets that FinestImaginary has attended. Whilst at these events I have encountered a new species of Man, of which I count my self a member. These are the Craft Marketeer’s Boyfriend/Husbands (or CMB/Hs***). Who and what are these increasing population of modern manhood and how does one identify them? Well… allow me to provide you with a CMB/H spotters field guide:

CMB/H’s are usually identified by the following characteristics

  • Slightly scruffy facial hair, somewhere between stubble and full beard
  • Check/Plaid shirt or a geeky t-shirt
  • More often than not jeans
  • A large majority wear glasses

Behavioural Traits:
CMB/Hs are found staggering, early in the morning, bleary eyed into any venue which will that day host a craft market. They are seen carrying large suitcases of stock to the respective tables of their marketeer, probably struggling under too much wait from some misguided sense of machismo****. They help set-up the stall, check everything looks good and is laid out in its right and proper place all before the market opens to the public and the marketeers begin to ‘do their thang’. At this point the CMB/H will shrink behind the stall and try not to put off any potential customers.

Not to be confused with:
Hipsters, fishermen, lumberjacks or members of the Fleet Foxes.

So now you’ll be able to spot them. Enjoy!

Being a CMB/H has its benefits, I’ve got to wander round some interesting places for example Saltaire, Sheffield and Leeds. I’ve even gone into my office on a weekend (IKR?!) when we’ve been to Manchester! Which has allowed me to take some fairly nice pictures.

This wandering round is usually due to my fear of putting of potential FinestImaginary customers by either distracting Kim or just getting in the way. But there is only so far you can walk and shortly after nipping back to the market for lunch I have generally walked around all surrounding area and could do with a nice sit down and a pint… but you can’t drink on your own (or at least I can’t!) so I never have 🙁

So, in the dying sentences of this post I am proposing the following to my fellow CMB/Hs. Kim and I will be at the Reet Sweet fair at Leeds Corn Exchange on June 5th… so I propose to go for a pint at Whitelocks at 2pm, any CMB/Hs who wishes to join me are more than welcome to! (I look like this).

Hope someone shows up! (p.s. we can all buy our marketeers a cupcake on the way back to offset our guilt / any trouble we might be in ;)).

* I was observing in Australia for the one I missed, luckily it was the middle of the night here so I was able to get a running commentary of how it was going over gmail chat**.
** The best quote of which being “I’ve been sooo busy I haven’t had the chance to have a wee!”
*** I’ve added the H to avoid confusion with the Cosmic Microwave Background which we are much much younger than.
**** Or they don’t have to go allllll the way back to the car! (I’ve done it before!).


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